Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

And he promised me he'd be sober.
I believe my dear, sweet, sainted mother expressed it best when she said, Bury God, some days it just don't pay to get out of bed.
I wasn't... I wouldn't... Remember, you're on parole.
Don't get your hopes up too high.
How's everything down at Army Reserve?
Yes, sir?
Why not?
Wonderful idea.
And here is my charming conqueror, the beautiful belle of the battlefield.
Hello?
Fetch the squirrel rifle and the ladyfinger bullets.
I'm embarrassed to even ask him to come down and take our simple little test.
Has your daddy ever bounced you on his knee?
Well, but... Shame on you, golden, that poor old man, into another hopeless uprising.
It's true, Jed.
Tell General Grant I'll see him later.
Yes, sir.
Well, here's to your 15 million.
General Grant, you're all wet.
I didn't win, but I was voted Miss Good Sport.